I am less than 3 days from my 3 week post op and I am just feeling down and Blah. I have read and been told that after Gastric Bypass your emotions are all over the place and I guess they are right cause mine are.
Since the middle of week 2 post op I have been feeling the blahs set in – it is weird to me because you would think one would be energetic and happy after having this surgery. Nope – it is quite the opposite really. I had read about this happening, but did not think it would happen to me. Some often regret having the surgery – now I have no regrets about that at all – I just feel depressed.
Being I have suffered from depression all my life and have been on medication for years I know that feeling. I am still on my meds, but for the first time in a long time that feeling is back. Hard to explain it exactly, but you just feel blah. I just do not have any motivation to do anything. I have found myself watching a lot of TV and laying around on the couch and in my bed with spurts of energy.
I am lucky to work from home so I am thankful I do not have to worry about getting up and going to work. But even my work has suffered because I have not given it much attention in weeks. It also does not help that it is Winter and I would just love to be out in the yard feeling the warm sun on my face.
I am counting down the days until Spring because I know being outside on my patio and gardening in my yard will be a huge help. I also know this will past or at least I hope it will. I have to remind myself that my body is still healing and has undergone drastic changes and it is also trying to adjust. Just sucks to feel blah, it really does.
I am not having a really hard time with the not eating part so much, even though I am tired of pureed foods. I do miss certain things like salads, sandwiches and my favorite evening snack which was pretzels and cheese. I remind myself at some point in the near future I will be able to have those things again.
I tell myself that I broke up with Food because we had a bad relationship and now I am in a new relationship, but we have to take it slow – baby steps.
My other problem is that before my surgery I broke off many of my bad relationships such as Smoking, Biting my Nails and drinking Coffee all day long. Now I am left with no bad habits and no vices – I think this is what is adding to my blahs as well. I have had coffee, but in tiny amounts and it is not the same without a cigarette to enjoy with it. I really miss smoking, but it is one relationship I do not want back even if it sounds so good. That relationship is expensive !!
I keep hearing the emotions I am feeling will pass and so I will wait and try and keep distracted as best I can. I am lucky to have great support between my family and friends, but it is still hard. I will keep you informed on how I am feeling and hopefully it will be short lived.
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